June 13, 2013 by thejalebichronicles
Life, OK Please: A pit stop for those of you hurtling through life at break neck speed.
Secrets have always fascinated me. I’ve always wanted to know everybody’s secrets. Those mysterious pieces of information that no one else is allowed to know are simply exciting. We all have them, those skeletons in our closet. The door is bursting as they scream to be let out. What is it about secrets that makes them so inviting? Why do we wish to know all about them when we know that secrets leave us not only physically but also emotionally encumbered? In my 17 years of experience, I would like to think that secrets have changed me and that maybe somewhere along the way, I’ve learned a thing or two about them as well.
Every secret shared between two friends solidifies the bond between them. Think about it; the closer friends are, the more secretive and exclusive the clique becomes. Inside jokes are nothing but secrets, aren’t they? Secrets form the very core of friendship. The smiles and the hidden mysteries no one else will ever know-all of it makes you feel like you are a part of something exclusive; something you alone know. It becomes a token system of sorts; the closer two friends are is proportional to the number of secrets they share with each other.
Have we ever stopped to think about the real reason behind the existence of these seemingly wonderful secrets? As Elena Bower of the Huffington Post so elegantly puts it, secrets almost always exist to ‘keep the peace’.
Your best friend really doesn’t have to know that someone said something mean about her behind her back, right? Life is messy enough without bringing to light that pile of secrets from underneath the rug, don’t you think?
While we are living this fantasy where people really don’t need to know about things that might hurt them, let us consider the fact that secrets don’t really exist. The definition of secrets by the Oxford Dictionary is, ‘something that is kept or meant to be kept unknown or unseen by others.’ So let’s be realistic here and accept that the minute you pass what is supposed to classified information onto someone else, the so-called ‘secret’ ceases to exist. But maybe, just maybe, if we allow ourselves to term this confidential material as a ‘secret, ’we can all agree that our secrets have grown with us. No more are our secrets about broken vases or crushes. Your best friend isn’t whispering tales of her mischievous exploits into your ear anymore. Instead, you are forced to listen as she sobs and tells you that her family is falling apart.
You can run, you can hide, but everyone everywhere will have secrets to share. These tidbits of information will captivate and astound you. The wide range of emotions they provoke will never fail to amaze you. Love them or hate them, secrets are here to stay.
– Abisha Fernandes